Quotables: Dead Like Me – A Delores Herbig Tribute

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Thanks to the Hulu Days of Summer and tragically unimpressive summer TV season, I marathoned both seasons of Bryan Fuller’s Dead Like Me, a dark comedy about grim reapers. Fuller left the show after just five episodes due to creative differences, but his fingerprints are all over the series. One character in particular strikes me as a person only Fuller could bring us: the uncomfortably intimate Delores Herbig, as in “her big” brown eyes.

In honor of Miss Herbig (Christine Willes) and a show that was taken before it’s time (like, well, every show that Fuller creates), here are some classic quotables from everyone’s favorite Happy Time Temp Agency career counselor:

“The homeless are desperate, passionate lovers, but they will rob you blind.”
–Delores on taking in drifters.

“I was going to call it Her Big Website, but I was afraid I’d attract people with a fetish for big things.”
–Delores on her 24-hour, in-apartment webcam site, Getting Things Done with Delores.

“No I said, ‘You choose.’ You’re in a new position now. You’re like, the prettiest girl at prom, or the sluttiest girl if you went to Catholic school. You get to pick.”
–Delores on having Millie, a.k.a reaper George, choose one hire from a pool of interviewees.

“You know, when you’re young like you are, Millie, it’s easy. Man, woman, bottom, top… sex is this big buffet, and you’re just a… fat man with a fork, but… as you get older, it’s harder to get a fork.”
–Delores on sex and aging.

And after the jump, video of Delores Herbig on getting a Pap test.

Did I miss anything?